Thursday, September 02, 2004

Top Ten Worst Answers to an Interview Question (Part II)

N.B. Part I

N.B.2 Today, in my morning, non-internet-access classes, I came up with the following list. I also came up with around 7 more interview questions that I can use in lists like this. And so, due to this relative abundance of material, I shall strive to post a list a day in this series until I run out of questions, patience or interest. (Or possibly until someone prompts me to discontinue, via polite suggestions, verbal/written threats or physical ones.)

Q: Tell me about yourself.

11. I’m currently attending med. school and I plan on becoming a veterinarian.

10. I collect road kill. I take the carcasses, throw them in my backyard to decompose then bleach the skulls and bones to wear as jewelry.

9. I’m originally from France but I had to leave due to “complications” with the gendarme.

8. I’ve been seeing your wife/husband for three months now.

7. I’m originally from Mars. I emigrated here with my godparents in the great Zircon migration of 1983.

6. I have twelve kids from five marriages. I’m currently unmarried.

5. I’m a Satan worshipper in my spare time. I dance under the moonlight naked and perform ritual sacrifices in graveyards.

4. I like to go shark-diving. By the way, does your firm offer life insurance?

3. I’ve got warrants out for my arrest in twelve states.

2. Well, I didn’t learn to read and write until four months ago.

1. I love you.