This is the first in a series. The interview process is starting up again and I'm brushing up on my interview *cough*skills*cough*. (Don't laugh. Yet.) And we can all use some additional advice when it comes to interviews, right? ..Right? [Thanks go out to a friend of mine for the idea for this list series.]
Q: Why do you want to work here?
12. Career Services told me that "student" isn't a real profession.
11. The name of your firm reminds me of my dear, recently departed dog, Bartholomew.
10. Apparently utilities and credit card companies expect me to pay them money. I mean, when did that start?!?!
9. I've always wanted to be a lawyer. In fact, my first toy was a gavel. I used to run around hitting the other kids with it yelling "Order in the court!!!"
8. Because you'll let me bring in my pet weasel, Rodney, and keep him in the bottom drawer of my desk. Your name is Rodney, too? You don't say!
7. Why do you think I want to work here?
6. Because your firm doesn't have a billable hours requirement. What? You do? Crap.
5. My anger management therapist told me I should put down the chainsaw and get a real job.
4. I need to make money fast to pay off some gambling debts. If that doesn't happen soon, I'm going to need handicap access.
3. I hear that on Fridays, clothing is optional.
2. Have you seen your secretaries???
1. Because I need a job, you moron!!!