Sunday, December 10, 2006

Online Dating Warmup

I've been avoiding this post because I don't really want to admit it. Because even though it's not really frowned upon, it is a little odd and most of my friends have not met their current S.O. through online dating. But I am writing this because I'm going to try something "new" for next year.

My New Year's Resolution is to honestly try and meet women. And since I'm not a barfly and I live at home with my mom and two dogs, online dating it is. Well, that and speed dating (which I do have to look into).

My efforts to find a date in the online realm can barely be termed efforts. I've posted here and there, sent 3 messages (total). Part of the problem is that I haven't really given it a solid effort. I also need to get some decent photos of myself as, well, I really don't have any. I'm not sure how exactly I'm going to work that one out but I'm going to have to try (probably with help from friends).

So tonight I gave it a first pass by trying to choose sites and/or learn more. Apparently I'm unmatchable by eHarmony (thank you very much) and so my first pick is dead in the water.

By the by, I'm probably going to look for a pay site, preferably a reputable one, as that alone will help filter out random passer-bys and such. I'll also give some free sites a shot, just because, but I won't rely on them. Likely free sites includ OkCupid and JDate (since I am Jewish).

Good lord, this article is damn funny. I hope I don't ever reach some of those stages.

As I'm writing this, I have about 8 other websites loaded and I'm reading some of them (hence the above link). This guy sounds like he's got his head screwed on straight. Sounds like a Jewish guy who's on JDate. He also recommended as another free Jewish dating site. And as for writing a profile, he recounts a time he helped a friend spruce up her profile:
One thing I explained was that the typical person hates to sit down and write about themselves. They just want to get into the site and look around and not have to essay homework. Meanwhile when people do write their essays they do it as just that. Writing an essay, which isn’t really an accurate description of themselves. If someone asks you to tell them about yourself, you’d say a few things and perhaps give examples. Unfotunately these aren’t the things you’d write in your profile - but it should be. Instead you sit down and write a bad homework.

If you want to write a decent profile, try to answer a few or even any of these simple questions:

* What inspires you? What makes you happy? Why do you exist?
* Who is your hero? Why?
* What was the last thing you did that you enjoyed. What was the last books you read, movies you saw, places you’ve been. Don’t write what you like to do or want to do - that’s fantasy. What did you do last sunday?
* Convery what you are missing and what you are looking for.

Try to be original and unique. What makes you different than all the other people here that have different photos but also like long walks on the beach?
Pretty good advice. I like to think my profiles are written with a smidgen of that kind of thought, though I doubt they're as eye-popping as I'd prefer. Maybe I have to give this whole thing a good second try instead of the medioce first tries they've been getting.

Back to other business. I also briefly looked for guidance about pay sites. There's this Online Personals Watch which does link to an article that compares some sites. The skinny? I should probably try and maybe

PlentyofFish is another free site.

Other pay sites include Perfectmatch and Chemistry. AmericanSingles is another pay site.

Hrmm. Maybe I should really try to get some decent-to-good photos and give the free sites a shot (possibly with one pay site, True).

Sheesh. Well, I haven't really gotten anywhere here. But I do think I might have a direction. Step 1: Photos. Step 2: Profile (and I have some good starts here). Step 3: ... Step 4: Profit! Errr.. Girlfriend!

In reviewing this post, I can see I've already flipped at least once or twice on the pay sites or free sites thing. Ugh.

Alright, it's 10:30 at night and I need to be in bed. More on this another time.