Quotation Goodness, Part I

Courtesy of a post on Daily Kos:

"Cuban dictator Fidel Castro is still in the hospital with a serious medical condition. Castro said that a half century of Communist rule seemed like a good idea right up until the point he was rushed to the hospital in a '55 Oldsmobile."
---Conan O'Brien

"President Bush has rejected calls for an immediate cease-fire [in Lebanon] on the grounds that he'd prefer a "sustainable" cease-fire. It makes sense. He doesn't want the killing to stop until he's sure it will stop. So there will be more killing until the president's convinced that there will be no more killing. Or everyone else runs out of people."
---Jon Stewart

"President Bush had his annual medical exam this week. The doctors said the president remains in excellent health and is fit for duty. In fact, so fit today the National Guard called and said, 'So how about serving your time now?'."
---Jay Leno

Jon Stewart is the man. 'Nuff said.