As I was walking from my car this morning, I thought that to myself. Actually, it began with me thinking of a personal ad for my Paladin and digressed from there. So here are a few things (including the personal ad) that would make the game, in some sense, more "lawyer realistic."
23rd Season SWM Human Paladin tank ISO sexy Night Elf for fun, TLC/healing, buffs, maybe more. Must supply own potions and armor. Message Belic.
The humanoid monsters should occasionally drop a special item called "Complaint." This item would be a mandatory pick-up and function like a quest-based long-duration curse. It would start with the target's Spirit being reduced by half (Spirit -50%). Then, while still holding this document, the player would have to find an "Answer." This in turn would reduce the players Strength by half (Strength -50%). Next, the player would have to find a "Discovery Request and Interrogatories." Agility -50% and Armor -50%. Next, a "Motion for Summary Judgment." Stamina -50%. Then a "Ruling on the Motion for Summary Judgment." Intellect -50%. Lastly, a "Lawyer's Bill." Hit Points -50%. Having collected these 6 items, the player would take them to an NPC in the main city and turn them in. The reward would be: a high fee (player must pay it to the NPC to end the quest), a weapon permit (allowing the player to wield his weapons against the humanoid enemies), a cloak with very nice stats called "The Lawyer's Bane," and a choice of a new weapon (i.e. a hammer called "The Gavel," a dagger called "The Letter Opener," a staff called "The Lawyer's Aid," a sword called "The Sword of Justice," an axe called "The Equalizer," a wand called "The Quill," etc.).
There could be a special dungeon of lawyers called "The Court House." The enemies would be humans ("lawyers") wearing suits and wielding briefcases and security guards. The lawyers could shield themselves with their briefcases while they blare loud, annoying chatter-like sounds over the player's speakers, in an attempt to scare the player away. The boss of the place could be a judge. His main weapons would be spell-like abilities such as "Demoralizing Glare" (a stat-reducing curse), "Constitutional Argument" (a DoT spell), and "Precedent Citation" (a DD spell with a snare component). The reward for defeating the judge could be some cloth armor ("The Judge's Robes," +Intellect, +Spirit, +Agility, chance to proc a freeze-like slow effect when struck) and/or a 1h hammer ("The Judge's Gavel," +Strength, +Stamina, chance to proc a 2 sec. stun) and/or a special off-hand item ("The Rule of Law," +Intellect, +Spirit, +Stamina, chance to proc a ).
Make a new class in the game called "Attorney." This would be a combination pet-owner/spellcaster class. The pet would be a summoned one called "Attorney's Aide." Upgraded versions could include "Summer Intern," "Expert Witness" and "Paralegal." The Attorney's spell repertoire would primarily consist of debuffs, that is spells that reduce the enemy's attributes or have other non-damaging negative effects. The Attorney would have to also have some damage-based skill, either damage spells or, my preference, weapon proficiency with daggers, hammers and staves. The class' armor capabilities would be leather and the class would be able to wield small shields. The Attorney would also have a few unique group-based buffs to offer, not to mention a few decent self-only buffs to increase the class' fighting skills. The Attorney would also have access to a special item-based spell-like tradeskill called "Drafting." This would enable the Attorney to make some very powerful buff, debuff, crowd control (mez, stun, root) and damage spells. Only a few of the documents (e.g. The Will) could be used by non-Attorneys.
Enough for now. Do you have any suggestions for including lawyers and/or "the law" in computer/video game worlds?