Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Crazy Idea

So, about when I wrote the previous post I had this crazy idea (that I'll likely never act on):

What if I quit my job?

What if I went in tomorrow, gave my 2 weeks notice and just quit? No specific plan in mind, no fallback, no prior directed efforts, just a radical change, a leap (of faith as it were).

Sure, it's probably just an escapist fantasy, one that I've been dreaming of for a few years now, but it's so darned appealing. To just toss everything to the wind and see where I land. 'Cause I'm sure not making any progress as it stands.

There are so many reasons not to, and yet I can think of reasons to do it.

Nay: Bills, money, health insurance, security, fear. Effect on other activities (i.e., gas money).

Yea: Change, movement, moving out of my mom's house, progress, hope. Courage.

It feels like one of those things that I'll ponder but never do. Although to be fair, there are a number of things I've pondered and done. (I can have be strong-willed when I want to.) I'm kinda hoping that I don't do it. I'm kinda hoping I don't have to, that I can find a more natural (smoother?) way to resolve things and make progress.

But if I can't...

If I can't figure it out...

When I mentioned this to one person, they suggested using a vacation to do some soul searching rather than upending the whole cart. Take some time off, get away from things and try to figure it out. I remember watching a segment during the Winter Olympics how Apollo Ono's father forced him to do that, to decide whether or not he wanted to pursue speed skating. I wonder if it would work for me.

Maybe that's not a half-bad idea. Hrmmm..