THL Quotes

Some choice quotes from THL today:

Excuse me, SIR, you have something to say about my ride you go ahead and say it to my face and then you better pray to the god of skinny punks this wind doesn't pick up 'cause I'll come over there and jam an oar up your ass. Not that I have an oar on me, per se, but I'll find one. Anyway, let's not concentrate on my neuroses, it's making me feel uncomfortable and thirsty.

Now that I've quit caffeine - again - I've realised something about myself: I am not nice. Caffeine gave me a veneer of niceness and held back a raging torrent of bitchiness I am now powerless to contain without caffeine's civilising effects. It's only the morning and already I've uttered the phrases, "He's fucked with me for the last time!" and "I'll make sure he never works in this town again," and I've hmmmmmph'ed a lot in people's general directions. Also I killed a man with a trident.

These had me laughing hysterically. Oars? Neuroses?? Tridents?!?!! Sounds like my kind of morning! (Or a real kinky night. Either way it spells f-u-n!)